Letting Go and Climbing Up

Me and my baby at the top.

I recently had a conversation with a friend and came to a strong realization. We were talking about our weight, of course, and about expectations. The emotions just flowed to the surface. I was so angry that society expects us to be a certain weight, a certain size, a certain number. I just realized that I am HAPPY with the person that I am right now. Yes, I still have weight to lose to fit into what society says is safe and healthy. But I AM healthy. I AM strong. I am fitting into cute clothes, I am striving to eat healthy and to be happy. So I just let it all go. I let the stress of losing more weight slide out of my life. I know I said was going to take out diet and losing weight from my vocabulary. But I couldn't get it out of my brain. It seriously was a huge burden that was lifted off my shoulders. I have been so much happier and making better choices by just simply letting go. I'm no longer fighting myself, I'm working with me. That's so funny. But it's true. Certain foods just aren't tempting anymore due to the simple fact that I can have it if I want it. But I just choose not to. It's been wonderful.

My Mom invited me to go on a hike up Battlecreek. I knew it was going to be hard, and almost called it off. But I needed to go. I needed to prove something to myself. I didn't quite realize what it was until I got to the top. The whole time I was struggling up that mountain, with my 25lb baby on my back, I sang(in my head) The Climb by Miley Cyrus. I pure love that song and it's still my theme song. I wont lie to you, that hike was a killer beast. My heart rate shot through the roof, my calves were killing and so were my upper butt cheeks and I had to stop several times. Half way to the top I realized that my baby represented the weight that I have been able to lose. I could still be carrying that extra weight around on me. But I'm not. I did it. I lost that weight and can do so much more. I proved to myself that I am still stronger then I thought possible.
We really booked it up that mountain, it only took us 60 minutes. I'm so glad I didn't whimp out. I plan on doing this hike with my Mom again next year and do it even better. Cause I'm not done getting healthy. It's still a fight every day. I'm just not fighting myself anymore and that makes a huge difference.