Scotharoos, to delicatable to pass up

This morning I was reading in Mosiah with my kids and came upon the last verse in Chapter 7. I had to read it again, and then one more time just for good measure. I love how you can liken the scriptures to your own life at certain times, if your heart is ready for it. This is what vs. 30 says:

But if ye will turn to the Lord, with full purpose of heart, and put your trust in him, and serve him with all diligence of mind, if ye do this, he will, according to his own will and pleasure, deliver you out of bondage.

I realize that this could have reference to a miriad of topics and all sorts of bondage. But for me right now, my bondage is my addiction to food. And what a comfort it is to me to know that I don't have to fight to be freed from my bondage by myself. If I just turn to the Lord, trust in him I can be free. What does serve him in all diligence in mind refer to? I think we have to put forth our efforts and not just sit around waiting for him to give us the answers. We have to actively be putting our minds to the task at hand. My task is to get control of my eating every single day. We are also reminded that things happen on the Lord's time table, and not on ours. There are things that I have to learn through my daily struggles, and until I truely learn from them I'll keep falling. But that's okay, because the Lord is loving and will help to pick me back up again.

This week I have been doing awesome. Until I had to prepare my sweets for the Ornament exchange tomorrow. I made Scotharoos. A treat that I make only at Christmas. 'They're not synonomous with Christmas, it's just I don't make them any other time of the year. When I was done making them I tried them out. And then again, and then one more time for good measure. As I look back on that mistake there were no emotions attached to that episode. Except for the fact that they tasted so good, and maybe I felt a little deprived. Which I shouldn't have since that muddy buddy episode last Friday. Obviously I still have issues to face. And what it comes down to is the restriction I place on myself. But those restrictions have to be in place if I'm going to have any kind of success at losing this last 20lbs. I can just hear Melissa in my head right now, " Then you just don't want it bad enough." I do want it bad enough. I'm just so easily swayed by other people. I hear what they have to say and give themselves allowances and then I feel like I need to give myself allowances. But that can't be the case. I have to be diligent in mind or it's not going to work.

I've said this time and time again. Losing weight is such a difficult and emotional journey. Not one to take lightly or half heartedly. Trying to lose weight during the Holidays is also a difficult task in and of itself. But I am strong. I've made it this far and I can continue to be strong. I have many battles to face over the next few weeks. I have to make the decision now to say "No", to pass on the sweets, to freeze them and save them for Sunday night.

I don't want to fail again. I've already mastered that. It's time for me to master a new art, healthy living.