Wednesday, February 8, 2012

A closet full of clothes

My weight has fluctuated since the birth of my last child.  Heavy, a little lighter, Heavy, even Heavier, a little lighter.  Through it all I have a closet full of clothes that sometimes fit beautifully and other times torture me every time I step foot in my closet.  I was doing some organization in that closet and though I'd might get rid of a few items.  A feeling stopped me from doing so.  Even though I am at a heavier time in my life, very soon, some of those clothes I will be able to fit into again.  And a little while longer, hopefully those clothes will even fit a little lose.

It's hard to look at clothes you were once able to wear and can no longer.  There is an ache in my heart to get back to wearing those clothes.  And only one thing can help me do that, self discipline.  Of course goals are important too.  Instead of letting those clothes hold me back, it gives me a greater desire to practice self-discipline and replace bad habits with good ones.  Like opening a piece of gum rather then the pantry.  Drinking water rather then soda.  Munching on veggies rather then candy.

Life will change for me.  I'm sure of it.  Even though I haven't lost a ton of weight since quitting soda and candy, I'm confident that it will soon start to fall off.  Maybe slowly at first.  But I'm sure that as soon as I get myself into a regular exercise routine that it will hopefully begin to fall off more quickly.  And if it doesn't despite the change in my diet and level of activity, I am prepared to accept myself for the way that I am.  And I will buy a new wardrobe and give away my clothes to someone else.  They will be truly lucky cuz I have some stinking cute things in that closet of mine.  But that's not positive thinking.  I promised myself to continue with being positive.  Changes will come, only time will tell when. 

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