Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Standing on the Precipice

Here I stand, at the precipice of change. Am I ready to continue with my commitment? Am I ready to go where I haven't been in a REALLY REALLY REALLY long time? Right now I am just a few pounds away from my pre-Grace days. That weight is a weight that I've been at since Beckham's been 18 months old. I never seemed to make it below that. Okay, maybe less by 3 or 4 lbs. But the clothes that I am wearing now are clothes I can fit in comfortably and have been comfortable in them for years. Am I ready to go outside of my comfort zone? Am I ready to work harder, move faster, eat healthier then I have in a REALLY REALLY REALLY long time? How strong is my desire? How strong am I really? Stronger then I think I am. I am ready to move forward. I am ready to not let anything get in my way!!! Not even myself. The last time I tried this losing weight gig it took me from January to July to lose the weight that has taken me just 2.5 months to lose this go around. I refuse to be complacent. I refuse to be comfortable at this weight. I know that I can do better, be better. The future is exciting for me now. What will July bring for me? How much weight will I lose by then? How much stronger will my body be? How much trimmer will I be? How much farther will I be able to run? How much more energy will I have? How much more in love with veggies will I be? See? The future is exciting and this is the first time that I have realized that the future can be exciting. Change is fabulous. Change is hard, but it is so worth crossing that precipice into a new me.

It's going to happen. I can still feel that desire pulsing through my veins. What an exhilerating and uplifting feeling.

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