Well I haven't written in a few days. I have been trying really hard to be positive with myself as you know. I was so excited about my 2lb loss and then we had to go and take Damn family pictures. I looked at those photos and all my good thoughts went directly down the toilet.
Why does weight loss have to be so difficult?
Why are positive thoughts so hard to keep in your head?
Why does food have to be so tempting?
Why does my butt have to jiggle so much when I run?
Why does my front butt scream " look at me, I'm never leaving" when i look in the mirror?
Why does my back fat scream " I'm your second set of breast" when I look in the mirror?
Why? Why? Why? Why?
It makes me want to CRY and SCREAM and PULL MY HAIR OUT~~~~~
4 comments:
Amberlyn,
Seriously, the best laugh I have had in days!
I mean, maybe weight loss is the least of your worries...I mean is you fat is talking to you...
okay, just kidding.
I know exactly how you feel.
But here's the deal.
It was just brought to my attention that I don't like to have photos taken of myself.
Hummm..
I did not know this.
Okay, sorry. I'm in a mood.
But really, I don't like to see myself in photos. And even though I might not like how I look, my children and my spouse are fine with it.
But by hating it so much, I have allowed myself to be erased from our families memories.
And when my children are grown, they are going to look back on the photographic evidence of our lives, and I won't be there.
So, you have to take the picture.
And maybe, you don't have to like it, but you have to remember that the people who love, love you JUST AS YOU ARE.
They are going to look at the photo and they won't see your fat screaming at them. They will see the person that they love.
I know you are not having a problem getting your picture taken, but I think that one of the reasons your fat is SO LOUD, is because you cannot yet recognize that everyone else around you doesn't hear it talking.
I know I say the same thing every time. And I am really saying it as much for my benefit as I am for yours.
It is hard to lose weight. It took a long time to gain, it will take a long time to lost.
It is hard to change our habits.
Food is good.
But we stay positive and we move forward by thinking of all the people who love us (including ourselves) and we make positive choices.
And each positive choice will lead to the next, until your trail of positive choices is so long, you can hardly see the bad ones scattered in.
Keep moving forward.
Keep going.
Seek the motivation and the positive reinforcement when you need it.
Put yourself in places where you can get that positive feedback.
Do things for yourself that help you remember why you matter.
Remember why you matter.
You matter.
Ahh, sis. What a sad post. Just remember to give yourself time. When you feel self sabotage coming on, try to think of how you are a blessing to others--through your motherhood, friendship, creativity, etc. Focus on the good and give a round house kick to your talking front butt and back.
My front butt definately needs a round house kick!!!
I am trying to see myself as others see me. Your right, they don't see my fat when it's screaming at me. All they see is the beautiful person that they love. No one is making me feel this way except for my fat back and front butt. And even then, it's probably not as bad as I am imagining it.
As down as I am right now, I have to say that I have stuck to the diet REALLY well. Yes, I had another free afternoon on Sunday. But it stopped completely on Monday morning. Back to basics again.
And Denise, for your Family's sake, take some pictures of yourself. Let your kids take pictures of you with the other kids. My kids LOVE it when they get to use the camera to take pictures of me and their syblings. Not only will your kids want to know what you looked like, but I'm sure you will regret not having that record as well. It's for posterity.
I love it! I love the way you describe things Amberlyn. And I promise my fat was screaming as I was trying to run to first base tonight. It's all good..... at least we're not ugly. We can lose weight! Ugly people are ugly forever.... :)
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